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Reflections…Week Forty Nine

canstockphoto8630797The remains of the snowman are still present in the back yard, even though it has rained for several days of the past week. Each day I look out of my bedroom window whilst mopping up the condensation upon it, expecting to no longer see the defiant remnants of said snowman. Each day it is still there, showing the debris of the Autumn fall it picked up as it was being rolled, somehow refusing to be flushed away by weather that has left Spot and I soaked.

One smiles at the thought that somehow each little snowflake has, whilst joined with others, stood strong, and shown a strength that it held not on it’s own.

But somehow the term ‘snowflake’ has become the new derogatory name calling to anyone that is being defiant to, well lets for arguments sake call them – ‘Bullies’. For a lot of the time it is from, conscious or not, a bullying mindset.

Look at how the term is used when trying to end a discussion where facts are used, they will usually end up being called a ‘snowflake’ by the ones that are using emotions and beliefs as facts because they do not have the data to disprove the others standpoint.

Trolls know that this is true, and they also know it is the ONLY word they have to place onto a post to get a reaction. It is basic playground bullying.

However the term is being taken back by the ‘snowflakes’ as a term of pride. Just like the snowflakes that fall from the sky and are then joined together as this snowman, they too have been joining together and standing firm against those that wish to wash them away, and they have been making a difference. Having done it once, they will do it again, each time that they do they have a chance to bring with them something that is not a snowflake, but is just as important a part of the snowball as each snowflake, just like the collection of the Autumn fall in my snowman.

Yes – this snowman will eventually disappear, but he was my Son and I’s first one built together. That will never change, the memory will live on and it is, for us, a historic moment.

Those snowflakes falling down individually, came together and created a change in our lives by becoming this snowman. Snowflakes are much, much, much more than what meets the eye, and if ever you are called a ‘snowflake’, wear that badge with pride, own the word.

For it is the Snowflakes that are the ones that are going to stand up for good, decency and  humanity in these times of fear, mistrust and doubt. When you take the power of the word from the ‘bullies’, their name calling then becomes compliments. It’s even more fun not to let them know they are complimenting you so that they continue to do it.

Snowflakes Rock.

www.awanderthroughthemind.co.uk/reflections-2017

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Go with the flow. Echo Update.

IMG_1618ECHO had its first group session at the new place of The American, more turned up than most of us expected, this was a welcome sight as many were wondering if now was the time to stop coming.

Thats not to say we have given up on ECHO, far from it, but the serenity that Brunswick House offered contrasts greatly to the atmosphere of The American, this does not help to ‘settle in’. I am lucky in this respect as I am familiar with the American, many are not, and the process of going somewhere new can be overwhelming, but I too was hesitant as to whether the group would work here.

Chaos was expected as no routines have been set up yet, and chaos was the format for the beginning.  This will improve as time goes by with more input from us to make it work.

Emotions were being suppressed by everyone to differing levels – anger, confusion, dejection where common but most present is probably uncertainty. We have had a letter explaining what has gone on with the funding cut and how we have been given this reprieve by Brighter Futures and the generosity of Swan Bank Methodist Church in order to keep the group going , though not the same, until the end of March.

It also tells us how they are pursuing different avenues toward funding but basically it is looking like ECHO requires a night in shining armour to save the day. Understandably this alters how one approaches the group as a whole – it now has a guillotine at the end of march.

The worksheets, have become more clinical, as I call them, or educational as another does. What we got used to was a more caring way of them being worded. For example:-

You have to take four tablets a day… A Clinical response would be something like…Take two twice a day on a full stomach. A caring approach would be more…Take two tablets at dinner time and two at tea. Both say the same thing but the styling is completely different and I believe the latter helps the info to be absorbed better.

We definitely need to get the CBT papers less clinical.

(Disclaimer).  Now the term CBT has never been used in conjunction with these sessions, but I have found no difference in these and the CBT courses I have been on and the key principles in which they both work are the same.

And in this line of thought I am sending an email to the B.F boss with an idea how we may get some written for us by a University student or two. I don’t think the person who runs the group will have enough time to do the re-writes, unless she takes them home, and none of us want her to become burnt out.

As for me, I have been keeping myself busy, avoiding dealing with it, I am currently looking a a dragons tail that needs scales painting. I know it is the wrong way to do it, especially now I have nearly read a book on mindfulness that was clear on what it means to be ‘present’, and locking myself away from the outside world only makes it worse, but the habit is a lifelong one.  I’m working on replacing it with a more healthy approach.

On the plus side however, I have discovered that writing these blogs has been part of my mindfulness journey, without me even knowing about it, and it is also one way of allowing myself to process the information of the current situation and the Poetry/Prose(new chapter) has been called a cathartic release; this stage has yet to happen, I doubt it will be pretty when it gets here.

On we plod…

www.awanderthroughthemind.co.uk

Reflections…Week Thirty Three

Though the week was weighted, a lot got done. Dr’s sorted, several appointments sorted and it ended, well nearly, on a visit to the petting farm.

The Saturday was an extra sleepover for my son, bonus, and boy did he wear himself out. Not long out of a cast to alter his leg position, he went like a bat out of hell on the play areas, this level of activity is a positive thing as it has helped his leg be in far better condition than if he wasn’t.

The goats, as always here, are my favourites. Goats are second only to dogs on animals I would like as pets; if they ever cross bred a dog and a goat I would get one.  Also here are donkeys, ponies, sheep, ducks, rabbits, guinea pigs, a turkey, chickens, a couple of other birds I have no idea what they are, a pig and a couple of lamas.

All bar the rabbits and the pig could be hand fed, if you were brave enough to get near the lamas you could even hand feed them.

I was, with one of them, then the other came running over – ears back head extended, I feel I should point out that I had seen this behaviour with other people before we got over there and it had been followed by spitting, I was expecting a soaking.

Turning sideways, head facing down, like I had been taught  previously with horses, I waited. It seemed confused, but the ears were still flat against its head, the other came over for food, I would have given it some if it wasn’t for those teeth, They must protrude an inch in front of their lips, not going to chance hand feeding without a bowl. So I ended up dropping some food on the floor, backing away gracefully and staying dry. I cannot say the same however for the next people, I heard the spitting around the corner.

www.awanderthroughthemind.co.uk/reflections-2017

 

reflections…Week Twenty Five

canstockphoto8630797Today I have come back from a weeks holiday with family, and it has just                       re-affirmed the idea I could live in a small space.

The living/dining/kitchen area was approximately 18′ x 12′ and this was roomy for four, large for two and when I was on my own, it was huge. The ceiling was about 7.5′ at the apex and it did not at any point seem low. The bedroom was the usual size but this is not really relevant, this will become clear in a little while.

The second toilet was a bit close in, about elbow room each side and no chance to pick up anything by your feet, flushing, washing hands and drying on a towel was a twizzle around, the flush behind, sink, little too big for the space, to the left and towel to the right. The other shower/ toilet was a little wider but the sink cabinet got in the way of my left leg, the shower was wide, but the head was over to the left, you could stand on the right to be out of the water spray, there was this weird little shelf in the middle that frankly just got in the way of my right hip.

On the outside was a space for a shed at the back, a 10′ x 6′ shed, and by the side was a patio area,10′ x 10′ with grass, 40′ x 10′, in front of that and to finish the outside tour, the car had a space at the front to park so lets say 6′ x 22′.

This works out at around the same square footage as the last house I lived at, including the outside. The caravan was also a three bedroom sized one, this is why the bedroom sizes are not relevant nor the toilet size, they could be altered within the space, But, and this is a big but, all this space would not be equal to the downstairs volume as the ceiling in the house was 11′ tall and then it had the upstairs and then the loft space. So cheaper to heat.

The following is from several conversations…

But that’s not big enough for a family! I have had this statement when talking about tiny houses, and this would not be a tiny house, just a small one.

It’s not for a family, it’s for one maybe two people.

But what if they want a family?

They would not be looking at this house.

But if they want something small they can get a flat!

They want all the outdoor space, the storage, the patio, the veg plot area and a place to park their car. You can’t get that with the flat. Oh, and they want to own the land and their home, cheaply, with the opportunity to be semi sufficient with resources.

You have to compromise, if you want all that you need to buy the family house.

So what you are saying is a single person or a couple that could easily live in a home this size and have the outside benefits, needs to have the expenditure of the larger size building that they don’t need, are to have the running cost, or rather waste, of heating/lighting space they don’t need or use very little and have less space outside, that may be in the shade due to the house height? Which would impact the heating/lighting cost.

Also if the home was smaller, they could work less and live more. And with these changes, even with a car, their environmental impact would be much, much, smaller. Growing 10% of their food would also reduce their environmental impact too.

Oh, I suppose..but it’s still not a family home.

Let me ask you this question…

Did you leave your mums as a married 2.5 child family? 

If the answer is no, then there is a need for an affordable small house. There is a want for them and the future will require them. There are lots of empty plots of industrial/residential land around me, some have been this way for years, why are the small houses or static caravans for homes coming up against such resistance? Taxes could be paid the same as for the family houses and they could be connected to the grid just the same. We accept the idea of caravan parks for holidays, even owning one for such, but to live in??? Unacceptable!

At some point the penny will click. Usually it appears just after retirement, when the time has gone past.

But here is the kicker for me, I’m an antisocial person who seems to be drawn to a lifestyles that have a community base at its very core. Maybe it’s because they seem like me. Or have I become more like them?

www.awanderthroughthemind.co.uk/reflections-2017

 

The Hashtag Question

What exactly is the hashtag question?

Well mine was after a discussion with my sister, I was asked to help explain what a hashtag was, well I knew it as a filling system, but only with a number…#1, #2, #3, so on and so forth so for me #=’Number’ and of course Twitter, something I never really understood, too many hashtags and not enough substance.

Though I know that the last part of that statement is not completely correct, the tweets I used to get on my feed were more akin a competition to get the best number of re-tweets for the #.

By writing this and including so many of them, I too feel like I have entered that     re-tweet competition.

But, upon further reading it appears that Blogers are now putting the hashtag in their blog title. This can have two effects

  • Increase the traffic to the post.
  • Decrease the traffic to the post.

The latter comes usually with the over use of the hashtag.

My thought is…What if I place the hashtag down the bottom of the blog and link it to the title of the same blog? Would this then have the same effect to pulling in traffic?

So on this one experimental blog I have done just that. Now how do you know if it has worked? By using my views, usually I have under ten views, the most is 30+, so in this way I am the best candidate to show an improvement in traffic, after all in blogging terms one is a small fish in a very big pond.

The other way to know if it worked is if you came here and are reading this from a # link.science-experiment-clipart-1208540-cartoon-of-a-science-professor-conducting-an-experiment-royalty-free-vector-clipart

www.awanderthroughthemind.co.uk

#HashtagQuestion.